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I’ll make another admission; I’ve gone through marriage intensives with couples that at the end I would have predicted there was no way they would heal their marriage. For example, recently a couple came through our weekend intensive workshop for marriages in crisis that shared a remarkable story. Like so many others they didn’t understand the danger and forged ahead with a friendship that was destined to become a passion.

Though highly involved in their church, she had gotten too close to another member and that had gradually led to adultery. By the time they realized they were on the wrong path, they were so enmeshed with each other that they were convinced that the best thing for everyone – spouses, children, church – was to divorce their spouses and marry each other.

The night she told her husband her plans, the emotion was so intense that soon she was in a deep sleep. The real cause of her deep slumber was the depth of her emotional state.

Nevertheless, he spent the rest of the night praying over her sleeping body.

On the other hand, for many years I’ve seen the salvaging of marriages that seemingly everyone else has given up on.

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