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But if a relationship is what you want, and you want a boy who’s just as serious about being in one as you are, ignore these texts.You’ll save yourself a lot of grief—and a lot of anxiety about composing the perfect “sexy” reply.

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The best way to express your disinterest in these types of texts? “You can let a guy know you refuse to take his messages that late by ignoring them,” says Wanis. So, his unsolicited requests for photos or unexpected confessions of fantasies could be expressing a strong attraction to you—or he’s simply attempting to satisfy his arousal through some naughty texting with the first girl that came up on his contacts list.

If this guy really wants to see you outside of his dorm room in the wee hours of the morning, he’ll get the picture and text you at a more socially acceptable hour. Whether his sexual come-ons are a reflection of his attraction to you or a reflection of his horniness, your guy wouldn’t be sexting if he wanted a relationship.

So while not all hope is lost when a guy can’t keep a date, this type of message should make you wary. But if seeing your name on his phone doesn’t immediately grab his attention, chances are he doesn’t regard you as a top priority.

According to Wanis, “The best way to respond to this is to say, ‘Okay, I’m available Wednesday or Thursday, which day [works for you]? The fact that he acknowledged his lack of response shows that he does have some courtesy, but only enough to respond when it’s convenient for him.

’ What you’re doing is responding in a masculine manner by being direct and clear, and you’re now giving him an option.” If your guy is interested, he’ll willingly agree to make alternative plans and, this time, he’ll (hopefully) keep them. It’s more likely that, instead of truly missing your text, your guy was evading a conversation he didn’t feel like having at the time–or didn’t want to have altogether—and claimed to have “missed” your text as a handy excuse. If he can’t make your conversation a priority, then make sure he knows that he’s not a priority of yours: “Oh, don’t worry about it. ” Your flippancy might just make your guy step up his game (and pay better attention to his phone! What does it mean when a guy has suddenly morphed into an inarticulate caveman?


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